How to be Insulting to Amateur Actors
* Darling, if only you threw your voice about as much as your body, we might get somewhere:
After enduring a non-stop amateur production of Twelfth Night Sir Henry Irving was buttonholed by the equally amateur director as soon as the show was over, to find out what the great man thought of it.
'Capital! Capital!' said Irving. 'Where's the lavatory?'