How to be Insulting about Spouses

He's been trying to drown his troubles for years — but she's too good a swimmer.

They're living proof of the union of marriage. They have two minds but only one thought — hers.

They're a perfect match. He thinks nothing's too good for her and so does she.

There's no point in him taking out a life insurance policy. All he needs is fire insurance. They both know where he's going to end up.