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From the TV Series Red Dwarf

Episode - Timeslides

Rimmer: Lovely service, Lister! You should have come -- most uplifting! (Seeing LISTER is very depressed) What's wrong with you? Ah, it's November! Nearly time for your bath!

Lister: ...I'm sick of you and your silly green suits, I'm sick of your stupid flared nostrils. I'm sick of the way you always smile when you're being insulted.

Lister: (LISTER is standing beside Adolph Hitler as he makes his speech.) Ignore him! He's a complete and total nutter! And he's only got one testicle!
Rimmer: (He gives Hitler the finger, just as the short dictator Zeich-Hiels.) What's he doing now? He's scuffling with Adolf Hitler! You can't just stick one on the leader of the Third Reich!

Lister: (Spotting Kryten) Hey, what happened to him? His face -- it's grotesque, isn't it? Has he had an accident? He looks like he spent three weeks with his head jammed in a lift! It's totally shady!

Rimmer: I'm going in. I'm going in to rescue him.
Holly: Rescue him?
Rimmer: It's my duty. My duty as a complete and utter bastard!

Rimmer: You call this happiness? Surrounded by toadying lackeys and paid sycophants? Living with a love-goddess sex-bomb model megastar? You call this contentment? You know, I stand here now and I look at the two of us, and I ask one simple question: Who is the rich man? You, with your fifty-eight houses, your private island in the Bahamas, your multi-billion pound business empire; or me, with... with... with what, I've got. (Pause) It's you isn't it? Yes it's all very clear to me now. You -- richer and happier... I should have thought a bit harder about that speech, really. I cocked it up a bit, didn't I?


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